Loss.


A refection on the passing of a dear friend and family member

The cost of having real, honest, good people in your life is that someday you’re going to have to say goodbye. The thought of losing someone so close is almost paralyzing in plain view. But as quickly as I was to break down from the news of his passing, I almost simultaneously felt relief and gratitude. Our time together was nothing short of fulfilling and for all the right reasons. 

Recently I heard a quote that a person should be focused more on their character rather than their reputation. Your character is who you truly are. And your reputation is what others think of you. 

In his life: he didn’t care for the attention, never sought out the love and affection, and refused to focus a conversation around himself. It. Was. Never. About. The. Reputation. Rather, his focus was centered on pure, real, honest, and genuine character. 

Now let me pause. How can you judge a person’s character? And to answer this question, I propose a second question.

Have you ever truly believed in someone? Have you? I mean really believe. As in anything they say you can somehow justify or agree with them. 

I suppose to evaluate character is relevant as to what we compare that person to. But for the sake of simplicity, we can all agree that when we trust in someone’s heart, soul, and mind- we believe in their character.

There were many lessons and memories I experienced during our time together. I’ve highlighted the humanity of his genuine character over and over again in my head. Three summary points are compatible to apply in all our lives.

1)    Never lose your sense of humor. No matter how bad the situation.

2)    Whatever you do- do with integrity and pride

3)    Love like it’s your number one priority, because ultimately it really is.

To put my thoughts to a close, I thought about the bare bones of my relationship with this individual.

Yes, I looked up to him.

Yes, I loved him.

Yes, I cherished the way he treated others.

And yes, I appreciated his uniqueness and creative mind. 

But the truth, the end all be all, the conclusion to sum up what I felt for him…

I believed in him and in his character. 

And when you can confidently say you believe in someone, it’s indicative of a good character.

So today I want you all to remember to laugh, approach every situation with integrity, and love one another unconditionally One Day at a Time. Because that’s all that good character really is. 


David Halvorson | 23 January 2019  |@dhalvy99

David Halvorson